Internet Interaction - Year Abroad #3

Next up on Inter:Mission: a bit of an experiment...

After almost 2 months on my year abroad, I decided that I would stop leaving my love life up to the Gods, and I would take matters into my own hands. No more waiting for Jean-Pierre to step around the corner in his stripy shirt and beret and take my breath away, it was time to get proactive. After thinking through my options briefly, and overhearing a conversation between colleagues, my mind was made up; online dating.

I think attempting online dating is the perfect example of something that has captured my year abroad spirit. I can’t imagine that I would create any such profile in the UK, predominantly through fear of cyber-running into someone that I know, but when in France my self-judgement seems to go a bit hazy. I can always say that I did it for an article anyway… Justification out of the way, a bit of research led me to the most popular French online dating website, ‘adopteunmec.com’ or as we could translate, ‘adopt a guy’.

As the title suggests, the website is heavily focused on girls having all the power. While men pay 30euros for the privilege of a picture of themselves and a couple of descriptive sentences, girls get the service free of charge. Not only do men have to pay, but in order to send a girl an email, the girl has to ‘accept their charm’ before one word can be exchanged. I like the sound of this already, no creepy 50 year olds asking you if, ‘you have ever been with an older man’ (apparently that happens). The site continues to amuse with  sections such as ‘sales’ where you can find the ‘best’ guys easily under categories such as ‘geek chic’ and ‘sporty’. My favourite aspect has to be the option to, ‘add to cart’ when you find a man you’d like to chat to, so it is basically just like being on Asos.com (more justification you see). The attention to detail on the site really makes the whole experience quite agreeable, although perhaps more so if you’re a girl…

Without a care in the world, I set up a profile indicating my Erasmus status and a photo chosen by Slovak (read my previous article to find out more about him). It was worryingly easy, within 5 minutes my photo had been approved and I was starting to feel a sense of that phrase Miley has us all arguing over, ‘female empowerment’. Flicking through images of 21-26 year old men within 50 kilometres of Bordeaux, I couldn’t quite escape the feeling that I was being horrendously shallow, but perhaps that’s the point of girl power.

After a necessary cull of many of the ‘charms’ and an addition of a second photo, the seemingly more normal guys began to surface. A few ‘bonjour, ca va?’ messages later and I already have a date night set up with a guy whose profile picture has him holding a puppy. Assuming that it will be a disaster, I really have very little faith, I’ve asked Slovak to ring me an hour into the date to ensure I’m safe. No doubt I will be back at my laptop keyboard shortly writing about how disastrous the whole thing was… I do hope he brings the puppy though. 

Dangerous Domestics - Year Abroad #2

My second column for Inter:Mission, this time I decided to talk about moving in with strangers...

When you make the decision that you want to live with other people (rather than in a studio flat) on your year abroad, you put your hand into a lucky-dip of unknown personalities. You may create future friendships that are to last, or you could find yourself slap bang in the middle of disaster. When you decide, as I did, to live in an Erasmus flat where the people change every few months, you are multiplying that risk by 10 and adding a pinch of communication trouble into the melting pot too.

When I first moved into my 4 bedroom, ‘this’ll do’ apartment in Bordeaux, the first person I met was a lovely Austrian girl studying French in the city. We immediately hit it off, chatting about lots of things we had in common and about how beautiful Bordeaux was. Perfect, at least I’ll have one friend. Not so, she soon informed me that she was in her last week, and she didn’t fail to add that the other guy, a Slovakian, was an interesting personality.

She was right, the Slovakian guy was an interesting personality. Although rather charming, especially if you’re into the Russian/eastern European accent, I soon discovered that he was affording his travels through blogging. ‘How interesting, I like to blog too. What do you blog about?’ He has 100 webpages apparently, and one of the most prominent money-makers focuses on a lovely group of 5 English boys called One Direction. Ah. The second eyebrow was raised when I asked his age and he responded that it is a, ‘secret that even my ex-girlfriend doesn’t know’. Of course I headed straight to Facebook, (I’m slowly discovering that an obsession with Facebook stalking is a decidedly English attribute) and after much searching of birthday posts and graduation years, the most I could deduce is that he’s older than 33. He still won’t tell me.

The next to enter my flat of eclectic eccentricities was a French girl who couldn’t understand a word of French that either Mr Slovak or I said. Although I am well aware that my French is not perfect, it is at least comprehensible. Whether I was confused, insulted or mildly irritated, her bedtime of 8pm on the second evening told me everything I needed to know about the longevity of our friendship (or lack thereof). Even Slovak said he didn’t fancy her, and that’s saying something.

Despite the mystery of an Erasmus flat, I truly believe that my year abroad is designed for experiences like this and I love it. When else will I get the opportunity to learn about different cultures so intensely and be able to shout Britain’s praises to others? ‘The Olympics was just such a huge success, you see’. Also, my room has a lock. That helps.

You can find the original article on Inter:Mission Bristol here.

A Disastrous Date - Year Abroad #1

I have started a fortnightly column on the fantastic website Inter:MIssion Bristol where I'm going to bare my soul and talk about some of the embarrassing things that happen on year abroads. My first piece is all about a date that went disastrously wrong...

Image: bizeminervois

After 1 month in the wilderness, I decided that it was just about time to dive head-first into finding my Jean-Pierre. By that, I mean the stereotypical year abroad boyfriend; floppy hair, sickeningly romantic but not quite interesting enough for it to last the long distance after you leave. I should point out here, for interest, that we were advised to invest in such boyfriends by Bristol; apparently it will be ‘wonderful for our language skills’. Perhaps invest is not the right word.

Upon making my decision, there were many things to be considered. Should I fancy someone at the office? Should I take to one of my roommates? Should I join an online dating website? Alas, I apparently decided the best option was to meet a man at 3am in a promising location…in the street. I should definitely mention at this point that I wasn’t actually drunk, nor he, but I accept that it’s not the most romantic of scenarios. Well, anyway, it gets worse.

After agreeing to go on a date with this boy, we exchanged numbers and each headed our own way. After multiple triple texts, a Facebook add and a doubling up of those excessive texts as Facebook chats, it began to dawn on me that the street might not have been the best place to meet someone. ‘Don’t be so judgemental’ I told myself, ‘he might not be that bad’. He was that bad.

Our date night was set, we were to meet on the steps of the beautiful Bordeaux Grand Theatre. As I left my flat, allowing myself the perfect time to be between 5 and 10 minutes late, I heard my phone ring. Apparently he was 15 minutes early; he just wanted to let me know. Not too strange, but not normal date night etiquette I would suggest.

After meeting and having the mandatory awkward not-sure-which-side-to-kiss-first hello that so often happens in France, we headed off in a direction that I assumed was to find a bar. Not so. He thought it was appropriate to take me to his hotel room, he’d bought a bottle of wine apparently. After seeing the sheer panic on my face, we agreed to change his plans and head for an Irish pub, in a public location, where there are other people.

If I hadn’t had enough blinkingly obvious deal-breakers already, now came the explosive bomb that finally blasted away my naivety. ‘So what do you do for a living?’ I asked politely, ‘Oh, I sell sex toys’ he responded casually. I was momentarily amused to find out that apparently the word for ‘sex toys’ is the same in French, but then realisation dawned on me; this embarrassingly keen, wildly inappropriate vibrator vendor was not going to be my Jean-Pierre. Time to make my excuses and leave.

You can find the original article on Inter:Mission Bristol here.

If only...

Tea-Total in Wine Country - Life In A French Office

I was recently very flattered to be asked to write a piece for the Travel section of the University of Bristol’s newspaper, Epigram. Two months into my time in Bordeaux, I decided the best theme for the article would be my attempts to integrate into a French working environment…

Image: Flickr: Aurdesco

One of the greatest benefits of having a year abroad is that, for one year, we briefly leave behind the 'Bristol bubble' and get to dip our toes into the paddling pool of real life. Of course, there are many that choose to study. However, the majority of British students who go to France opt for life at a desk with a cup of strong coffee in one hand and an AZERTY keyboard to tackle with the other.

Like most Bristol students, I had done various bits of work experience where I sat at a desk pretending not to be on Facebook, so I felt I had a fairly good grasp of the way things work in the corportate world. However, on my first day in my marketing office in Bordeaux, I learnt very quickly that things are somewhat different here. The first earth-shattering, fear-inducing panic attack came when I discovered that my office, shockingly, didn't have a kettle. Apparently on the odd occassion that they make tea, also sacrilegiously plumping for fruit tea over black tea, the microwave is their method of choice.

The tea debate was made even worse by that fact that the French word for kettle, brouilloire, is possibly the hardest word for an English person to pronounce. Therefore, as I resigned myself to the fact that the french prefer coffee to tea, I decided to embrace my surroundings, or as the cliché goes, 'broaden my horizons' and made the transition. You may think that I am over-dramatising a mere swap from tea to coffee, but my next shock came in a more physical manner; their coffee was strong enough to give me the shakes.

Leaving the ktichen behind, I was there to work rather than to drink hot drinks after all, I was soon showed to my desk and introduced to my colleagues. Cue awkward cheek kissing. The interesting thing about working in your second language is that the simplest task becomes a nightmare. Sending a quick email to your boss sends shivers down your spine: what if it is littered with mistakes? Using Microsoft Word leads you to believe that your computer is trying to trick you as 'ctrl + B' no longer turns your words bold. Why is it trying to search your document instead? However, all this pales into insignificance the first time you hear the dulcet tones of a ringing phone. You look around to discover that you are the only one in the room. You brace yourself as you pick up the phone: 'Bonjour ... pardon?' 

Despite the many difficulties I've faced during my first two months in a French office — being asked to translate 'Sidebar Widget' is fairly high on the list — I have also learnt a huge amount. My favourite aspect of the office has to be lunchtime where we sit down together to share bread and cheese in the middle of the table. Even though I may still occasionally hide my Facebook in the bottom corner of my screen, or pretend to work when I'm actually writing an article for Epigram, I have certainly gained a fresh outlook on office life. I'm looking forward to diving in permanently sometime in the future.

You can find the original article on Epigram's website here and the complete E2 Living Section on Issuu here.

'20 Things 20-Year-Olds Don't Get' - A Response

I recently read the most fantastic article by Jason Nazar on Forbes about young people and their attitude to business. The no-nonsense style of the article was a change from the molly-coddled, spoon-fed and watered-down approach of treating young people in the 21^st century, especially by career professionals (Huffington Post recently argued, rather mockingly, that always being told we are special is ultimately making us unhappy). While I wouldn’t personally like to work under Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada, Nazar’s example of the most valuable boss, being told off for my future mistakes before I make them could be useful. Business is not about Miss Honey telling us what to do and giving us a big cuddle if we don’t succeed, it’s about pro-activity and initiative. I imagine it’s also about having a thick skin too.

Nazar talks about the emergence of social media in the business world and its longevity, or lack thereof. Although many would be offended at his suggestion that ‘social media is not a career’, his point is clear. Social Media is unreliable and may disappear as quickly as it arrived. Reports suggest that Twitter has already reached the top of its graph and is now on the decline and even Instagram feels the need to introduce advertising to prevent social media mortality being a reality. As Nazar states, Social Media is a tool for marketing that should be adapted to other business, rather than be the business itself. Social Media is simple, it is isolated and above all, it is unreliable. Business may not be reliable either, but it involves interaction with people and the formation of business relationships that can’t be acquired from posting on a Facebook page a few times a day.

Would we ask to go home if this happened?
Image: WeBlogCartoons

His comment, ‘Stop hiding behind your computer. Business gets done on the phone and in person.  It should be your first instinct’ is of particular relevance to my generation. We don’t pick up the phone anymore and many don’t even bother with email. In order to contact the Graduate Recruiters for the Big 4, it seems as though my comrades simply head to the Facebook page and add a comment to the long list of obvious and unnecessary questions before them. The way I see it, hiding behind our computers is making us anonymous, uninteresting and ridding us of all initiative. Asking questions has its time and place, but working something out for yourself is invaluable.

While I don’t agree with everything Nazar says, such as his rejection of tweet reading, the overall essence of his article appears to be a comment on laziness. Lack of networking, hiding behind social media and sending blanket emails; it is all easy. Picking up the phone, meeting business professionals and taking responsibility for our own mistakes may be tough, but it is rewarding. The Co-Founder of Docstoc has certainly persuaded me of one thing, there’s a lot more to business than sitting in front of a computer.

I urge you to read the original article, ’20 Things20-Year-Olds Don’t Get’ on Forbes.

The Things the French Got Wrong

Image: Waldo

My self-prescribed mission was to embrace French culture as far as is possible while in Bordeaux. My assignment thus far has been fairly successful; I buy bread most days from the Boulangerie, I spend 5 minutes kissing all my colleagues every morning and I’ve completely forgotten how to drive smoothly. However, as much as I am enjoying temporarily denying my true nationality, there are some things that I miss about Blighty…

QWERTY Keyboards. I fully accept that other countries should use other keyboards to fit with their languages. Accents are common in French, so therefore putting an é on the keyboard makes sense. However, banishing a full stop from its place causing it to be impossible to find is frustrating and being rid of a £ sign when constantly needing to write prices in English is infuriating. Needless to say, within a week, Amazon.fr was my new friend and the AZERTY keyboard was exiled to the shelving unit.  

Strikes. I know that we’re not entirely innocent of this at home, but the French take it to the extreme. The news must be checked daily to ensure that public transport is all running smoothly and an extra 20 minutes must always be left just in case. I found it particularly amusing when I was in Paris 2 years ago and there were large strikes over raising the retirement age from 60 to 62. In England, it’s currently 65. I kept my mouth shut…

Sundays. It may be unfair to say that the French get Sundays wrong, perhaps it is fairer to suggest that they simply haven’t updated their Sunday system along with the rest of us yet. If you wake up on a Sunday morning without anything in the fridge, you have two choices; no food or restaurant food. Shops still believe in a full day off in the south west, however, it may be interesting to note that the wineries are all open…

The Internet. The only one of my list that has actually been less of a nuisance and more of an annoyance. Our internet provider was genuinely proud of the fact that they take less than two weeks (10 days specifically) to deliver the box after we purchased the internet. When I, and the Austrian girl I was with, explained that our internet at home is installed immediately, I think they got a little bit offended…

As much as I have now become a regular user of the phrase, ‘this would never happen in England’, I imagine that the moment I step off the plane and step into a long queue back home, I shall utter the words, ‘this would never happen in France…’ 

Are We Obsessed With Social Networking?

A month of working for a communications agency, a brother whose job is a YouTube channel and a flatmate who makes a fortune by blogging about One Direction has all led me to believe that perhaps social networks have taken over our lives. I do love a good Facebook stalk/Twitter troll/Instagram snap as much as the rest, but maybe we should take a day off every now and then. Don’t you occasionally miss the good old days*? 

This wonderful cartoon sums up exactly what I mean:

Image: Wrong Hands: http://wronghands1.wordpress.com/

(*Good old days= 2 years ago)

Using Vine To Fill My Time

As you may know, I am currently in Bordeaux working in a communications firm that specialises in quality food brands. Although only an intern, I actually get to do some interesting work, especially with the English press and the brand, ‘Instant Naturel’. 

However, when there is a little time to spare...we like to make videos!

(with minions...)

Instant Naturel's Cake Decorations:

Instant Naturel's Flavoured and Coloured Sugars:




Instant Naturel's Vinegars With Fruit Pulp:

The Things the French Got Right

I am now just over 1 month into my time in Bordeaux, and I’m starting to shed my patriotism and accept that there are some things that the French do rather well. Although I will always argue that they don’t understand tea, there are some things that perhaps they do better than us...

Bank Holidays. This week there was a bank holiday that fell on a Thursday. The French have come up with a genius thing called, ’le pont’ (‘the bridge’) which essentially means that Friday becomes a day off as well so that the whole country gets a 4 day weekend to spend by the beach.

McDonalds. You know how when you walk into a McDonalds in England, you sometimes feel a bit gross just for being there? The French fast food establishments are actually quite swanky; rather than going to the counter to be served, they have machines near the entrance where you enter what you would like and then wait for your number to be called. Genius.

Cheese. My local supermarket has two entire aisles dedicated to cheese, need I say more?

Drinks’ Prices. We all know that wine is cheaper in France than in England, and that is particularly true when in Bordeaux. However, it did come as a rather hilarious surprise to discover that it is actually cheaper to buy a glass of wine in a restaurant than a Coke. Supermarkets trick you into boozing too; a decent bottle of wine in the South West will set you back just 2 Euros.  

Heineken: Would You Play Departure Roulette?

If you were given the opportunity to drop your travel plans at the push of a button and head to a new and unknown destination, would you take it?

Heineken has launched a new instalment to its ‘Voyage’ campaign to test people’s sense of adventure. After setting up a departure board at New York’s JFK airport, the beer company persuaded the passing travellers to take a step into the unknown…

By pushing the green button, they would have to cancel their flight and forgo their original plans, whether it be going home or away, and head to the destination nominated by the machine, all expenses paid for by Heineken.

It is no wonder that the video has become viral on YouTube, with over 2.5 million views having only been launched less than a month ago. Heineken’s social experiment is able to capture the hearts and minds of travellers and adventurers alike, and the cleverly made video builds a sense of anticipation as those who turn down the opportunity are revealed first before the brave few step up to the podium. 

Heineken’s brand director, Belen Pamukoff believes a legendary trip requires spontaneity, “It should welcome random experiences where improvisation is the only way forward. This summer, in a variety of exciting ways, we are plucking guys from their everyday lives and dropping them into a world unlike anything they've ever seen”.

Would you push that button?

The Things I Will Miss About Bristol

DriveMinistry

As I embark upon my year abroad, in which I will spend a year in the sun meeting amazing people and having new experiences (all counts towards my degree apparently), I will occasionally think back to Bristol and my old home. I will only be away for a year, but here are a few things that I might miss…

Park Street. One of my constant confusions when plodding down Park Street into town was that every time I looked up, I found something new. After two years at Bristol, you would expect that I might have a pretty secure knowledge of my surroundings, but the mystery that is Park Street never fails to surprise. From random little restaurants, to foreign bars and even some dodgy looking clubs, each time I take the street, I notice something I’ve never seen before.

Lounge. I can’t explain it, I know it’s embarrassing, but I just know that I will miss this living room-sized sweat pit and their green jug.

Running into everyone, everywhere. Although Bristol is a city, for the students, it’s a small one. I shall miss those awkward moments when you don’t know if you should smile or say hi and in the midst of confusion, you inevitably end up keeping your eyes on the pavement and walking by.

Free Stuff. Whether it’s the Christians and their BBQs or the obsessive amount of pens I pick up at each Freshers’ Fair, I am certainly going to miss the freebies. Let’s hope I can still get my student discount in France!

Making jokes about the ASS. The best one this year? When it snowed: this is not the first time 7 inches has stopped me reaching the ASS. I have a feeling that the French just won’t understand…

Image: Spotted in the Ass Library - Bristol/Facebook 

The Places of Bristol: The Bierkeller Theatre

Part of Bristol’s charm are the quirky, tucked-away little theatres that I seem to come across sporadically every now and then. No exception is the fantastic Bierkeller located in the city centre that opened only a year and a half ago. Slightly bigger than the likes of The Wardrobe and The Alma Tavern, this theatre gives an arguably edgier feel to its shows and has a capacity of 400.

On meeting the Artistic Director Alex MacMillan, he was eagerly telling me that it is in fact the last Bierkeller that remains and their stage, the very same one that sits there today, has played host to the Stone Roses amongst other big names. His enthusiasm for his theatre was in keeping with the general Bristol theatre vibe, and The Bierkeller is as friendly as they come.

The auditorium being their only downfall, I was reliably informed that they are soon to receive tiered seating from The Tobacco Factory which will hugely improve the experience. From university shows, professional theatre to improv and more, The Bierkeller has a busy schedule of entertainment, unsurprisingly booked up until November already.

If you’re in a theatre-going mood and stuck for options, don’t forget to check out the Bierkeller website. There’s a plethora of performances going on and a bar that serves bizarre cocktails named after them. 

5 Great Bristol-Related Websites

What it says on the tin.

VisitBristol. Probably designed for tourists, but I can’t get enough of it. This is the best place to go if you have some free time and don’t know what to do with it. Whether you want to go to the theatre, find a National Trust stately home to wander round or find the perfect place for your parents to stay if they visit, this website is incredibly easy to navigate. They even have a section called, Rainy Days Out.  

BristolCulture. This little gem is written by one man who has his finger in every little Bristolian pie. From reviews of theatre offerings to news about opening cafes and restaurants, this is the site to head to if you fancy an eclectic mix of Bristol information. I found out recently from BristolCulture that Jason Donervan plans on visiting Jason Donervans… 

Inter:Mission. This one is more for the students, and I’m a little biased because I write for them. However, if you’re stuck for something to do then head over to the Inter:Mission calendar and the weekly planner which will let you know the best things happening that week. It’s also a great place for the more quirky student, a fan of the intimate-venue, up-and-coming band scene? Head to Inter:Mission Bristol. 

ThisIsBristol. I don’t always agree with their theatre reviews, but if you’re after local news then this is a great place to head to. The website is updated regularly and it’s a really good way to make yourself feel more connected to the Bristol community, if that’s what you fancy. 

Crack. For the more fashionable amongst you, Crack Magazine’s website is the place to go if you love music and art. They keep you updated on the anti-mainstream, you can even play tunes on the site. What’s more, they have a physical version of the magazine that is FREE and widely available.

The Places of Bristol: Boston Tea Party, Park Street

Image: Trip Advisor

Although this may not seem like an original choice, the reason I have chosen this dainty little coffee shop is for its garden. Already loved for its ethically-sourced products and family owned atmosphere, the Park Street branch of BTP was in fact its flagship location set up in 1995. The café boasts a large collection of teas and if you’re lucky, the baristas even put a nice leaf pattern on your coffee. 

The secret of this place, however, is only to be found when heading towards the toilets in a ‘The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe’ style-moment. Heading through the tattered door, you come out the other side to a beautiful tiered garden. With lovely rock tables and heaters for cold mornings, the garden really does charm its customers. 

This picture doesn't do it justice!

So next time you fancy some Red Berry and Hibiscus Tea or a Get your goat, you’ve pulled! toasted sandwich, why not head to Boston Tea Party on Park Street? Find the old door that takes you through to your own peaceful garden, stealing you away from the hustle and bustle of city life just for a little while.